So I sent a shit sample off to have tested for bowel cancer and I got the reply that my poop has some irregularities (?) . They say I have a one in ten chance that I have bowel cancer, now I have to check into hospital and have a camera pushed up my butt to see what’s up.
Moments like that make you realize how suddenly this life-game could be over and out. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not afraid of dying , that’s part of life, but I regard myself as a bit of a punk, so I don’t want to go out with colon cancer, it’s just not rock n roll.
What a way to start the year! now I have to wait until February to get the results, hopefully it’ll be ok, maybe they got the shit mixed up at the lab, or maybe I took the sample after a spicy meal, we’ll see, whatever happens it’s no longer in my hands (the sample never was, by the way). That’s what happens when you get diagnosed , your existence is no longer in your own hands, you enter the universe of hospital waiting rooms and letters you daren’t open. As long as I don’t end up shitting in a bag all is well. I can’t see myself carrying my shit around with me, I mean how does that even work?
So , wish me luck, you never know, I might even enjoy watching the camera up the butt experience on a tv as I lay there taking it like a man. Whatever happens my relationship with my body will never be the same.
Take care blog, I’ll keep you updated on the ass stuff.
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