How to live, in end of times.

 

I belong to a group of people known as the worriers. The people who let their day be decided by the news, and the news is always bad. Okay, the news might end on some uplifting story or sports achievement, but before you get to that, you have to sit through a half hour of doom and gloom. War, drought and forest fires, megalomaniac tyrants, genocides, crime, and economic downturn forecasts. By the time it gets to the one or two ‘good news’ items, I’m already convinced of the world’s pending doom, be it through Climate change or violence.

Not that I can actually do anything about any of it. My grand contribution is to recycle, avoid buying useless junk, nod at the neighbour, eat fresh vegetables now and then, and pretend I’m not judging everyone. Supposedly this creates ‘positive energy’, whatever that means. It’s hard to keep up the act when the world seems determined to set itself on fire just to see what happens.

So I worry.

Meanwhile, in my immediate vicinity, life is carrying on normally, people going about their day doing what they do. But when you are a worrier, it is very disconcerting to see people around you just doing the day-to-day stuff while on the news and in your mind, doom is on its way. “How can all these people not see what is happening?” You ask yourself. “Shouldn’t we all be protesting? In the streets, saying ‘NO!’ To all that is going on? Try to enjoy your ‘guilt trip’ holiday then. Try to enjoy a concert, party, casual get-together, or village fayre when you are saddled with guilt over the world’s problems.

So what to do? Am I doomed to a life without enjoyment or superficial pleasure? Or is it possible to be aware and yet get on with life and all the amazing things it still has to offer?

It’s a real puzzle, trying to be a functioning human while knowing everything is broken. You’re supposed to go to parties and not ruin the mood by bringing up famine or melting ice caps. Personally, I haven’t cracked the code. I watch other people and wonder how they manage to keep a straight face. The options are bleak: become an activist and lose your friends, or tune out and pretend your tiny world is all that matters. Or maybe do both, which is just enough to fool yourself into thinking you’re not useless. Worst of all is just worrying and dragging around a sack of guilt and suspicion. Or, if you’re really ambitious, you can try to inspire others to do the things you’re too lazy or incompetent to do yourself. Write columns about it, get on stage and mock the system, and then go home and worry some more. That’s probably the most honest option.