Thoughts of the day.

For all the comedians and people who follow comedy and what's going on in the comedy scene. A few words about the Louis CK shit storm. We can't judge from afar.... and all that jazz. But that has never stopped us doing and saying things on stage about lots of other things from Bill Clintons 'bell end' to Terrorism, death and war. Things that for others are horrendous, shocking and sometimes lightly offending. We 'the funny truth sayers' always want to have our say. So why, pr ay tell, when the news is about 'one of our own' - Louis CK - do we suddenly lose the comedic gene and become either defensive or apologetic ? I mean I've heard comedians do jokes about the Holocaust FFS! So to paraphrase and adapt a comedic line from Louis CK - 'there's always good and bad, ok so Louis CK objectified women, used his name,fame and power to force women to watch him jack off, for this he's probably lost his career, his respect and a lot of friends........

I think it was the Motown group 'The Temptations that had the hit song 'Ball of Confusion', the opening lines of that song and the music are for me symbolic for how life has become. With the arrival of internet,social media and 24 hr scrolling news we have a daily 'waterboarding' of News(fake and real), scandal, trivia and issues that will define our future. Hardly have we digested such important issues as Trumps presidency or Brexit before we get submerged in the sleazy 'inappropriate sexual behaviour' of Politicians and celebs. Meanwhile we are confronted with theft on a grand scale as shown in the Panma and Paradise papers. Housing is becoming scarce, poverty is on the increase, racism is back from never being gone. The planet is creaking under the weight of human population and consumption,  profit driven urges make that corporations are prepared to sacrifice our health and our future for the sake of 'a few dollars more'. Religious fanaticism us...

Never Presidential, or even instrumental the way he talks just sounds mental. but he's the prez. This nut job is supposed to be 'the chief' but he got rich like some lowlife thief No empathy ,no love no care your struggle or grief he will not share. In God you trust? Well do so if you must when you're on your knees ask the man If this joke is some master plan.

If I was taller I might see This better future you promised me. If I was fitter I could run To the place you said was much more fun. But I'm short, too slow and much too slack Halfway there and turning back Where I started out seems like a dream Now I'm stuck on this trip and I want to scream nowhere is home, nowhere is me I'm never where I want to be No tribe, no clan, no place to rest moving on, no home no nest.

Don't let the news get you down that the guy in charge is just a clown, It's not all bad what we create just learn to see beyond the hate. Not all news is all the news it has to sell so they pick and choose. They prey, and pray that fear will spread 'cos that's the way they earn their bread. Look through this mist of the bad news show the light of humanity is still aglow. not all news is all the news .

Whatever made you think that white trousers are cool? I can see your black knickers ,you Marks&Sparks tool! I get that you want to look nice ,feel good and be proud but that jacket you're wearing is much too loud. So put down the glossy that brain washing shite, look in the mirror ,you're ok ,you're allright Cool's not for sale ,no version or chique Cool's a state of being, fashion's for the weak.

This is one I wrote after having a run in with a girl on the train from Kings Cross to Edinburgh during the Fringe Festival. She had a nice little Jeremy Corbyn T-shirt on, badges, all the right stuff, but she also had the window seat and wouldn't let me use the plug. I leaned in and said "Does Jeremy know you're for a monopoly position on the distribution of electricity to the poor and needy?" She sighed and carried on reading Karl Marxs' 'on the distribution of wealth' although it might have been Engels, great double act those two but I mix them up. I've altered the setting and context (for poetic justice), but it's about being judgmental and also solidarity. Hello ‘anon’ girl, do you remember me?  Probably not, but I just want to say, you were stood in the street with your leaflets we shared a glance the other day. Remember? I just walked by you and winked when I passed I heard you say “don’t wink at me you dirty old basta...

(A returning hero from Syria, his mum didn't know.)  "He's always been a good boy, 'cos he told me so, Always reading the holy stuff, tho' he had some quirky mates, I was just happy he wasn't boozing, 'cos them drunks are full of hate. Who would have thought my lovely boy would have been misled, someone fed his brain with lies ,and now some folks are dead".

Now me and Words get on well, me and words could tell you a tale or two but we keep most of them to ourselves. Words are good friends, they're always there we're tight they can almost read my mind they don't judge but sometimes they're hard. (but mostly kind) We manage to keep it quite fair. Be friends with words, they'll never desert you as life takes it's toll and brings pain they'll get you through it and you don't have to call they're only a thought away.

Had a chat today with a guy I'll never see him again The first born son of his father ,so obviously his name was Mohammed. Nice Guy In London for friends and business- from Paris through Mauritania. We sat on a bench in hyde Park started to chat, we talked of the weather and the trees, of people and their needs. In those 20 minutes we solved a lot of the worlds problems and tensions - for us. It wasn't that difficult, All it took, was the sun, some trees a smile, and time to think ,understand and relate. We shook hands wished each other well said goodbye. and left with a feeling of  'maybe' just maybe we can get through.

Big Cat shot by fat cat, fat cat pays to be the topcat, overpaid but underloved he compensates with bullets of extinction. Big Cat growls goodbye once at peace with the planet  now excess to the executive needs The last one is already born ready for the likes and clicks as it  fades into history with only a cameo role in the selfie. Fat cats , kill hope.

Put more sugar in their diet, put more lard on the arse, feed ‘em breed ‘em. Keep ‘em plugged in and switched on,let them consume ,consume consume. Don’t forget to tell ‘em this is paradise and that they are happy, give ‘em whacky DJ’s and feel good tunes, give ‘em Adele and Coldplay for the sad days, pour it in pour it in.  Just keep ‘em occupied, occupy their brain, no time for pain, keep ‘em running, keep ‘em scared. Zero hours contract and zero hours truth.  Give ‘em sport, give ‘em a flag, give ‘em an enemy within and another without. Let ‘em worry ,worry worry ...........and fridays give ‘em a curry.

Life expectancy is your free credit, The only free credit you'll get to see, It's interest free, in fact of interest to nobody. So use it ,get on with it, just remember there is no re-finance, there is no government funding, there is no emergency bail out Life insurance is that you use it and get out God isn't your Saviour just a bailiff, Move over, roll over,get out. Next please!

I've never been a fighter, yet everyday I fight, my opponent is always me. Usually he wins, but sometimes I catch him with a sucker punch, and set us both free, for a while.

It started out ok, the alarm went off as usual three minutes before six a.m. time enough to gather the senses and prepare for the day to start, waiting for the usual tid bits of information called ‘the news’. ‘Who is it that decides what’s news and what’s not?’ Steve thought. ‘I mean there must be millions and millions of ‘things going on’ all over the world, so who chooses what we Brits get to hear as being ‘the news’? There must be some person somewhere filtering it, or is it a commitee that meets at the dead of night somewhere in Broadcasting house, or wherever it is that the BBC now resides.’ ‘how come we never get to hear about what goes on in Canada for example? I mean although it’s more peace loving than it’s southern neighbour, something must go on there surely?’ ‘Whatever’ he sighed and rolled on his side, hand hovering above the off button ready to press when the news got too tedious or in his eyes downright Tory propaganda. The newsreader just had time to say ‘The Prime M...

It's all very 'bon' to call it a Scone, But I've always known You should call it a Scone. But I wouldn't moan when eating the Scone If the cream's not gone feel free to say Scone

I often wonder why it is we like so much to go on holidays to 'other places', places we love to brag about to our friends and family when we're back home in the day to day and the nine to five existence. I mean, if we love these places so much why don't we just go live there? Then they would become the 'normal and the boring, and going on holiday would probably mean going back to where we started. The going 'on holiday' is not so much about the place we go, it's more about the change we allow ourselves to have. On holiday you see folk suddenly become different people, more energetic, or just more laid back, more book reading or more dangerous sports. We wear different clothes, the stupid t-shirts sold at holiday destinations aren't there by accident. You'll see dads embarrass their children by suddenly wearing a weird hat, mothers that suddenly become beach divas, reliving the dreams of their youth (long forgotten). On holiday we get the feeling...

Today I went for a walk in town, just as I was entering a shop I realised there was a lady behind me ,so as I was taught when young I opened the door and let her in first. For this I received short sharp abuse, she told me she was capable of opening a door herself and that I shouldn't 'belittle' her. Totally confused, I went home and wrote this verse. No offence intended. Well hello girls, Ladies and Dames.  I don’t want to intrude  be offensive or rude, but I’ve lost my way in the gender game,   pleasing and teasing is what evolution has made  me accept as the way a man should  behave,  Please tell me, if I misbehave  When and where I’m playing the sexist charade?  Is opening a door for a Lady now bad?  Does it mean I just want her, and she’s right to get mad Does standing for a dame on a overfull train  disrespect her  please tell, I need you to explain,  the do’s and the don’ts in this gender game...

How screwed is the planet when the Prez of the biggest 'superpower' spends all day tweeting insults about womens looks, and blatant lies about his 'success'? Presidential? The guy is a psychopathic nut job, liar, bully and narcissistic maniac. Really America? is this really the best you have to give us and yourselves? From superpower to international laughing stock. Imagine if it were Putin, Kim Yung Un, or some warlord in 'Gofuckitstan' we would all be saying the guy was rea dy for a 'cuckoos nest' and very tight straps. Is this the end result of media-politics? Is Trump learning to play the fiddle as the planet sizzles? This could be the beginning of the homo sapien 'end game', as the 'civilized world' have overcome most immediate 'wants' we elect people because of their TV appearances and 'straight talk' ,we no longer care about 'truth' , 'fair play' or progress for all , we just see the world as one ...

I seem to have forgotten how to think,  am I alone in this? I wonder. What I mean is that it feels as if I never sit and think things through anymore. Situations and occurencies seem to just take me and toss me about on the waves of their whims, I just float and don’t struggle against it, I just wait to see where it lands me. If you were to ask me how I feel I couldn’t realy answer, I don’t feel good and I don’t feel bad, I just feel ‘ok’ . There doesn’t seem to be any highs and lows anymore, just a feeling of acceptance of where I am in my life and the place I have been given. How would I describe it? No idea. I still get annoyed now and again, especially at injustice and the way politics ruins so many lives and always seems to get away with it. It’s just that I never seem able or willing to form a really in depth analasys of the situation, it’s like a sort of mental fatique.  My opening sentence of ‘not being able to think anymore’ is of course exageration- one of my sp...

In the film 'Good Fellas' , one of the gangsters imitates a scene from the Godfather and says 'and when I try to get out, they pull me back in'. That's the feeling I have toward politics. You can try to ignore those who govern us, ignore their corruption, the obvious hypocrisy, their blatant misuse of public funds to enrich their friends in the private sector, but ignore as you may there will always be a moment when you are forced to face up to and take a stand on one or other moral question this system throws up. The only problem there is that once you start thinking about one problem it leads to another and another until you realize there is no 'one problem' but a system that is so intricately connected and interwoven the head spins when thinking about solutions. Shifting one of the building blocks of the 'system' we live in can lead to consequences far beyond the original idea of 'change' we had. So it is with Brexit. Do I need to re-cap?...

Another week another WTF? since the Brexit vote (just one year ago) it seems that world politics has been affected by a self destruct virus. Theresa May is the new  victim of 'politics of the meltdown' meme spreading across the world. It's a good job the UK has such strict gun laws or last week conservatives wouldn't have just been metaphorically shooting themselves in the feet, there would have been a few head shots too.  You would have thought that the Brexit negotiations would have been enough for any prime minister to handle, that those negotiations would need all the concentration and focus any one person can possess , but not Theresa, she thought a general election might be a good 'warm up' for the Brexit negotiations, she probably envisaged herself getting on the eurostar to Brussels with a group of Tory fans chanting 'easy easy' all the way there like misguided Arsenal fans usually start their european adventures. So now she has no majority i...

I don’t want to become one of those old guys who’s only preoccupation is the weather, but we do need to talk about it.  It’s still May and the temperatures in places like Belgium, Holland and Germany are in the 30’s , now I don’t want to draw any hasty conclusions but may I just say that it’s not friggin’ normal, whatever ‘normal’ still means in this age of abnormality (in all walks of life) being the new normal. It’s hot and I can’t handle it, if I were to convince myself that it would stay like this -for ever- I would consider setting up home in a cellar. We homo-sapiens don’t belong to the same family as lizards, this is not the environment we should be living in -end of discussion. I don’t get people who just lay in the sun all day and think it’s the best way to live. Anything above 28° and my brain goes into seizure, all I can do is find some shade or airco and wait until normality returns. But what if it didn’t ? What if this is the start of the ‘end times’ ? What if i...

Barcelona May 26th. It’s May ,it’s 34 degrees celsius, I’m in Barcelona. Once more I realise I’m not a person that functions well when the heat reaches this level. I don’t see the attracton of having to split the day into two sleep patterns and two ‘doing the shit you need to do’ -patterns.  I was booked to do some Comedy at a conference in Barcelona, and decided to stay an extra two days after the event and visit a friend- Tom, who lives in the town of Rubi nearby.  I’ve stayed with Tom and his family before, nice people, great kids, I was here last year in June ,so I should have remembered how oppressive this heat can be. Staying with Tom I get to see Spain as seen by people that actually live and work there, another advantage is that I don’t fall into the tourist traps and -the real reason I’m here- me and Tom like to solve the worlds problems in one of the small bars in the town square, any bar actually as long as it’s in the shadow. Tom has lived here 25 years but-l...

It's been a long time since I've blogged on this page, sorry for the regular users. I've had a busy time, the show I was touring with in Belgium has come to it's end, and I have decided to stop doing these (themed) Theatre monologues, and get back to doing stand-up comedy in line-ups wherever I can. So I am now bookable for Comedy evenings in Cafés ,bars, clubs and wherever. Free as a bird. Best way to contact me for that is at wilnigel@me.com  - feel free. I have also started doing a daily podcast- you read it right, daily podcast  , it's only 15 minutes, I do it in Dutch. So I'm trying different things at the moment, to see what fits me and what I want to do with the rest of the time on this planet :-)  (don't we all). The possibilities we have nowadays to connect with each other seem never ending, I mean even the President of the USA uses Twitter more than he uses traditional media. What we call 'the comedy season' is coming to an end, there...

I used to get caught up in political arguments, I used to think that my opinion was worth something, I used to think that I knew how everything was and why, now I realise that the longer I live the less I know. I've never really thought about evolution in the right way, I've read quite a bit about evolution of earth and us (the cancer that threatens it) , but I've always read in a way that made me think that 'evolution' was a thing of the past- something that had 'happened' . I have now come to realise that evolution is still going on, it never stops, not only with the earth (changing climate -not all mans doing) but also our own human evolution. We look at 'evolution' as if it will always be a positive outcome, but will it ? We humans seem to be changing at a rate the is too fast for our brains to adapt to, fast becoming Homo Digitalis and 'cross breeding' Homo Consumentis. The phenomena of 'burn outs' seems to prove this very po...

I often think of the way we are evolving. One of the things that makes me sit up and stare, is the way we (don't) interact. Last weekend I was in Utrecht for the Comedy festival, a nice Town, the typical Dutch streets. There is something about being in another town that makes a person notice more than when walking the streets of their own neighborhood, and so it was that I noticed the interaction on the busy square where I sat to have lunch at a Café. I was sat at a table, alone, waiting for my toasted sandwich and coffee to be served, looking around I noticed how many people were totally unaware of their surroundings or other people. There were a few other tables like mine where one person was sat but four people could easily sit , Saturday afternoons are busy and there were people looking for places to sit, a few shed glances toward the tables where only one person was sat, but neither they or the person at the table talked or asked the question about whether they would like to...

Wednesday 22nd of March. The day started bad, I took a tablet - my anti Cholesterol statin. I take 1 every evening so accidentally taking one in the morning as well means I have now taken two in less than 12 hrs, does this constitute an overdose? I’ll phone my Doctor in an hour when she’s in surgery to get her opinion.  I phoned the ‘anti poison centre’ which gives advice on these matters but all their lines were busy, there must be some epidemic of people overdosing by accident,  the result of an older population I suppose. I should write a column about lack of personnel at the ‘anti poison help line ‘ and the dangers of an older population and see if someone will publish it. -Note to self, if you survive the overdose get on to newspapers to publish your column on ‘What to do with the old?’ .  That title doesn’t seem right somehow, it sounds more like a preface to something a Nazi would write, - note to self ; change the title of the column you’re writing if survi...

There seems to be a lot of angry people on the planet, the news, social media, traffic, on the streets even my yoga teacher is pissed off at the fact that people don’t switch off their phones during meditation. Last week as I left the ‘quiet room’ I heard him scream “turn off your fucking phone dickface I’m trying to relax here you fucking hipster c*** .”  It was reassuring  to hear that even the teacher hasn’t yet reached his Nirvana. A lot of people are angry, angry at Trump, angry at anti Trump protesters, Brexiteers, anti Brexiteers, anti refugees, anti anti refugees, muslims,anti muslims, vegetarians, anti vegetarians , you name the subject and somebody somewhere is spouting off on Twitter, Facebook  or some other so say ‘social’ network about it. Everybody has an opinion and now we’ve found a way of ventilating it. There used to be a time when all this anger was contained to our local bar or family get togethers, now it’s all out there, digitalised hatred and...

So, Donald the Trump wants to expand the Nuclear Arsenal of the USA, he wants to be be 'top of the pile' in the arms race. I get it, national security is important, but how many times do you have to be able to destroy the planet before you realise that Atomic bombs are only an option once we've decided to end all life on this rock? The 'nukes' are not a 'strategic' option they are just a reminder to everyone that whoever uses it will start a chain effect that could wipe us all out, so there goes the 'National Security' argument. You can only have National Security when there is a Nation to Secure, after a 'nuke war' once the radioactive dust has settled, it'll just be the reality version of 'The Walking Dead'. So World leaders (the psycho ones) will start dick waving and trying to outdo each other on the "We can destroy the planet more times than you" scale. Money will not be poured into relieving hunger, illness and c...

I don't know how some people do it, every day a 'blog', pretty intense if you ask me. I manage about one a month. I write more than that but then think 'why would anybody want to know my thoughts on that' and then I delete it (I get enough time to speak rubbish when I'm on stage). We seem to be living in an age of total connectivity , and yet more and more people are crying out for attention. 'Blogs' 'Vlogs' 'Social media' etc etc ,posting photos of where we are, telling people what we are up to, what we are eating etc etc etc. I think it's time to step back and evaluate what we are doing. This life we have is not infinite, there is shelf life attached to it, the difference is 'shelf life' is determined, our life can be snapped away from us in an instant, an accident or illness is not always within our control, we can be here today, gone tomorrow. I don't really think that anyones last words have or ever will be "I ...

The year has only just started and the phrase of the year has already been awarded, 2017 will be the year of ‘fake news’ or as they used to call it ‘propaganda’. The only difference being is that because of the internet any of us ,given the time and the will , can produce ‘fake news’. Does it matter?  Well it matters to the chattering classes the ones that make ‘informed decisions’ ,but to most of us it doesn’t matter, we have other shit to do.  We have photos to post on instagram of the breakfast we ate, or the lunch we had or our cat’s new hat. We are too busy duck-facing ourselves onto selfies that will increase our likes on one or other so called social media.  Talking of fake news, the whole of our little rich western life is fake, nothing is real, so why worry just about the news. Friends aren’t real, friends are just people we don’t know that like our shit on facebook. Most of the ‘spontaneous’ photos we post are carefully put in scene. Nothing is real, an...

Whatever happens after the date , January 20th will go down in the history books as 'The day of the Donald'. Whatever you think of the whole situation it is a game changer. For me it seems like we have entered a new 'age' ,an age where politics has made itself redundant and we are now being run by the banks and corporations and the clowns they choose to take up the irrelevant positions in the public 'politics arena'. Politics seems to be the arm of Banks and corporations that redirects our anger at those who have no involvement in the ruination of our social and economic system. The banks and corporations that really run the show need politicians to avert our anger from them onto immigrants, other countries, anybody that doesn't look like us and the 'enemies within' that oppose those banks and corporations. I think the election of Donald trump is the establishments answer to the aftermath of the bank crisis and the rise of protest groups like ...